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Decor

Home Tour: Elise Alden’s Family-Friendly Mountain Retreat

Elise Alden's airy, cozy home in the mountains.

You know my friend Elise? The one who's an amazing party-planner and an amazing bananacake-maker, and owns the cutest kids' boutique in addition to managing glam | camp and designing and curating the most adorable little-kid clothing and accessories on the planet? (No but really: this necklace just got added to the site and I am DYING. Dyinnnnnng.)

Unsurprisingly, Elise's house is as warm and bright and sweet as she is. My favorite thing about it - besides its location in the Los Gatos mountains, which is basically paradise - she transformed it from a dark, dated space into a breezy home that's both comfortable and fun for kids, and beautifully chic for entertaining. And she did this not by spending zillions of dollars on decor, but rather by pulling together mismatched pieces from antique shops, thrift stores, and DIYing wherever she could - sidenote, the woman painted her two-story house exterior herself, which makes her an actual superhero - and ended up with a house that's completely her, from the hand-painted wall design in her girls' book nook to the ramshackle glam (sorry, had to) living room.

Lifestyle

Love Without Limits: A (Completely Unfiltered) Account Of One Woman’s Sex-Positive Open Relationship

Just FYI: Finding PG-13 (or R)-rated images to accompany a post on polyamory presents quite the challenge.

I have this friend. We'll call her Charlotte. Charlotte is one of my closest friends, actually - someone whom I've known for years and years, and who I trust enormously, like family. We met when she was single, and over the years I watched her date around, then find a long-term partner, then move in with him. One night, sitting at their kitchen table over sushi and wine, Charlotte and her partner told me - in the same tone of voice you'd use to tell someone about a cool new restaurant - about a party they'd gone to the other night where they'd both had sex with other people.

Oh, really?

Eat

The Very Best Stuff You Can Get At Trader Joe’s (According To Me)

Like so many things in life, the joys of Trader Joe's are sweeter for having known the sad, grey world that existed in their absence. Until I was twenty-seven years old, you see, I lived in tragic ignorance of the fact that pre-marinated meat could be so delicious (and so thinly sliced!), or that crumpets could be so wonderful-tasting that they could make the casual usage of the word "crumpet" (almost) acceptable, or that drinkable four-dollar wine existed. Even in those heady days during which I first roamed the aisles alongside fellow Himalayan sea salt lovers too broke for Whole Foods, Trader Joe's was a once-a-month special occasion, because each trip resulted in the purchase of oh, so much four-dollar wine that I was required to splurge on a $25 taxi ride home.

Now I am a suburbanite. I own a car that I call a "truck" but that most people would probably consider an SUV. There is a Trader Joe's located 15 minutes from my house.

And now? Oh, now I know all about it. I can close my eyes and see the shelves laden with quinoa chips and dried broccoli florets in stunning - even technicolor - detail.

Decor

Before And After: Our Kitchen Makeover Reveal

I've been dying to do something with our kitchen since the day we moved in. There's nothing especially hideous about it; it's just...dark. And when I take photos in it it's just super off-brand, you know? (Kidding. But only sort of, because I'm a blogger and photograph stuff in my kitchen all the time and how dark it is makes me nuts.)

Let's take a look at the before. (Note: when I moved in there was a black-brown-grey-white tiled backsplash, which I took out and drywalled over, and I replaced the off-white tiled floors with grey composite wood beams. So this is more like the "before...after I had one pass at it.")

Decor

Ramshackle Glam’s Top 10 Ikea Finds: Spring 2017

First things first: my children have now joined the ranks of People Who Have Been Traumatized by the Swamp Scene in The Neverending Story. 

The horse dies. Of sadness. (Artax noooooooo!)

On the positive side, they were traumatized while sitting in what might be the coolest kids' chairs ever created. Technically these things are called LÖMSKes, but we call them Space Eggs. We didn't intend to come home from our Sunday Ikea trip with Space Eggs, but come on: you would have bought them, too.

Lifestyle

Why I Went To Ikea (On A Sunday. At Noon. With Both Of My Children And My Husband.)

Ikea: the master of deceptive simplicity. (Image by Carl Kleiner.)

Going to Ikea on a Sunday is SUCH a rookie move. Going to Ikea at noon on a Sunday with your children and husband in tow means you don't get to complain about anything ever again, because honestly, you're clearly so poor at decision-making that you deserve whatever comes your way. Forever.

Except I had to go. Because I needed something that could only be found at Ikea, and Ikea charges $150 to deliver, and the alternative to going with my children and husband was going with my children and without my husband, and sorry nope.

DIY Projects

Use As Directed

In wake of yesterday’s garage-cleaning insanity (and in light of the fact that excuse me those corners were terrifying and I cleaned them anyway), I thought I’d whip up a little present for my husband. “Generous” is baaaaaasically my middle name.

Video

Saving The Worst For Last

For my final project in Spring Cleaning Week...this.

Whyyyyyy is it so hard to keep your garage clean? Every few months, I decide that I’ve had it with the state of our garage (cluttered! dusty! inexplicably scattered with Cheerios!) and spend an hour or two attacking it…but within a couple of weeks, like clockwork, it returns to its resting state (disastrous).

The thing about our garage is that it’s such an opportunity. It’s fairly well-lit and relatively empty thanks to the fact that we live in California and don’t have to actually park our cars in it. And given the not-so-massive size of our house, it’d be so nice to have a little extra space for Kendrick to set up his instruments; for the kids to play; for me to exercise (hahahahahaha); for whatever.

And so I put it on the calendar: Garage Cleaning Day. Not only were we going to reorganize; we were going to CLEAN THE BEAST. This process, of course, involved harrowing close encounters with dustballs that very closely resembled (and that I remain certain may have been) black widows.

DIY Projects

The Mortar Wash (Or “German Smear”) Experiment

The hideous, bright-orange brick on the exterior of my house has always vexed me: what to do about it? I mentioned this to my friend Erin, and she said oh, why don't you try a German Smear?

...See, to me "German Smear" sounds like a porn that I don't want to see. (Or maybe that I really, really do, depending on my mood and whether I've eaten recently.) Or maybe an extremely delicious sandwich. But probably not something I want to have happen to my house.

DIY Projects

Hi, I’m A Professional Flower Arranger

I am super aware that this does not look easy. It is so easy. I whipped this arrangement – which is nice and low, so you can put it on your dining room table without completely obliterating your view of your fellow diners - up using exclusively grocery store-bought flowers, and in about ten minutes. (Okay, my son helped. But still.)

Step-by-step how-to is below!


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