That I have a spider bite on my arm the size of a walnut, and am totally dealing with it like a grown-up, by which I mean only Googling "black widow spider bite" once (side note: do not ever Google "black widow spider bite").
In recent days I have also:
1) Walked through a web with the circumference of Texas and not freaked out (very much);
2) Handily dispatched a very large and unidentifiable creature that I found sitting on the guest bed in our attic; and