Making a fashion statement in the bathroom over here
Did you know I'm an actual, certified Internet Authority on how to stretch out your shoes? As unlikely as it sounds, somehow the oddities of SEO have made it so, because check it:
On Mother's Day morning, Francesca and I were laying in bed drinking coffee and scrolling through TheRealReal (because this is our favorite thing to do, especially when Kendrick indulges us by bringing us refills and also toast and then segues neatly into mimosa-delivery around 11AM), and I said, "Ooh, search for Vetements."
I love Vetements. I know I shouldn't, and I know I would never actually buy anything from the brand because I obviously cannot afford to, but I still find myself lusting over their stuff. If you're not familiar with Vetements, it's actually a Paris-based "design collective" with a largely anonymous design staff, and is sort of an experiment in what happens when "real clothing" is worn "in a real way" (distressed, DIY-ed, abandoned, etc). Think sweatshirts. With reallllly long arms. And logos. For $2k.
So depending on your perspective, what they're doing is either making wearable art, or blatantly taking advantage of impressionable fashion people and making a fortune while doing it, a la Derelicte. I am certain that my mother thinks everything Vetements makes is hideous. I am certain that it looks far, far better on people like Gigi Hadid than it would on me.
Omg, this photo. MEMORIES. I no longer have that pair of sandals, that hair, or that zip code (just re-watched our moving day video and sobbed through the whole thing)...but the shorts? Those are still hanging on. (I wore them today, in fact, which may have been a not-so-hot idea considering the fact that they're in the process of disintegrating, but whatever: I love them, and they fit me perfectly, and they are not going anywhere until the wearing of them results in the exposure of actual NC-17-rated body parts.)
If you've been reading here for awhile, you know that denim is sort of my thing. It's just what I feel best in - and what that means is that I've amassed a truly enormous collection of jeans over the years, approximately three of which I actually wear (so sue me: I'm fickle). And so every spring, I dig out a couple of old pairs that I can hack up with a pair of scissors and transform into new items of clothing that I'll actually wear. (As an aside, I know that jean cutoffs sound like the kind of thing you don't need a tutorial for - "...So you, like...cut them?" - but trust me: there are myriad ways in which to go wrong when doing something as permanent as slicing up your clothing. Let me help you.)
But DIY cutoffs aren't the only denim trick I have up my sleeve - and I am not a person who owns a sewing machine or enjoys do-it-yourself projects that take more than five minutes. Which is to say: The below projects require no experience, knowledge, or talent whatsoever, making them - to my mind - just about perfect.
When I was in New York a couple of weeks ago I discovered my old black-and-white Ann Taylor swing coat sitting in my bedroom closet, and decided I wanted to wear to that day's meetings. But it was 30 degrees outside and the jacket had elbow-length sleeves, so I decided that I should probably wear it with long leather gloves so as to prevent my wrists from falling off. But then I realized that neither my mother nor I own a pair of long leather gloves.
My beloved circa 2006 Las Vegas pawn shop ring
I love my engagement ring. It's one of my the very few things, including children and dogs (and, okay, Kendrick, but only on a good day) I would save from a house fire. (Sidenote: A few weeks ago, it seemingly vanished into the ether. I'm stopping myself from panicking with the assumption that it was taken off of my nightstand by one of my kids, and will turn up eventually in some completely unexpected and bizarre location, like what happened this other time I lost some very special jewelry.)
Anyway. I love it. But I also...kind of always wanted a ring-ring. Is that obnoxious?? Not a solitaire, and not anything wildly expensive - just something that was exactly the style and color and design I envisioned. I also had this vague idea that I wanted to design something myself, but that seemed like an insanely pricey proposition, between buying the stones and working with a jeweler to create a custom piece. I mean, who does that?!
