I get emails from readers every so often telling me their stories and asking for love/relationship advice. I don't print those emails here - not even anonymously - because...well, they're very personal, and they're not my stories to share. (Please, always feel free to email me with this kind of stuff, by the way - I love hearing from you regardless of the subject matter, and if you're nervous about me publishing anything a) know I won't without asking first, and b) just say "would prefer not to have this published," and it won't be, guaranteed).

I'm noticing, though, that a couple of ideas keep popping up over and over in the emails I send back to readers who ask what I've learned about relationships over the past decade or so, or what makes my relationship with Kendrick work.

First, you know how they say that you have to make all those horrible dating mistakes before you're able to open yourself up to a healthy, long-term relationship? That may not be how it goes for everyone, but it was certainly was how it went for me. I fell in love for the first time when I was 17, and broke up with that boyfriend when I was 19 (and then again when I was 22), and for a long time, I thought that was it. I'd been told once or twice that you never love anyone the way you loved your first love, and for years and years, I believed that was true.